I had never realized, the things I was telling to myself, were so horrible. That the way I saw myself was equal to the way I looked at a speck of dirt under my finger nail.
I didn't believe that I was my biggest cause of insecurity; I was my own bully constanly beating myself up until I was black and blue.
I didn't even notice these words in my head. I was just so used to them; I'd been thinking them all my life.
Fat, big legs, acne, nose bumb, kanckles, hairy arms, cellulite, bum, idiot, useless. -These words I didn't recognize until I tried this experiment.
The Dove France #OneBeautifulThought Campaigne has done it's job and it has seriously changed my self-perception. I wrote down all of the thoughts I had about myself in a book throughout the day and then had my friend read it back to me. As you can probably guess, we were both in tears.
I have come to the realization that these things I am constantly thinking about myself are causing problems in my life: I can't take a joke when its directed at my appearance or I stumble on my words when given a compliment. I'm like a balloon full of "Andreya-hate" ready to burst at the slightest touch.
I have resolved to write down one thing about myself that I love, every day for a year. This small editorial self-portrait shoot was inspired by some of the qualities I love about myself using the classic Andy Warhol portrait series style. I wanted to express my love for myself so badly (to make up for lost time) that I didn't even change out of my school uniform shirt.
Having the "Beauty Blues" is a big theme in this issue. Women seem to have been confused throughout history as well as in the present.
Your body was created beautiful and perfect the way it is. No one can tell you what you need to look like. I can not blame all self-esteem issues on the ominous "Media" because I am a part of the media and I promote my idea of beauty through it.
I love each and every one of my sisters (that's you) and now it's time I started loving myself. This issue will take us back in time, not to dwell on the past but to remember that our future is better. I encourage you to try this experiment because it will change your life. Then go and take a bunch of selfies because why the hell not?
Dove made real women write down every time they had a thought about themselves and then invited them to a cafe, where an actor read their thoughts to another woman.
This whole idea of "If you wouldn't say it to someone else, why say it to yourself" has me thinking that I am my biggest bully and for what reason? I am working on ways to improve the way I see myself and I hope you all can too.